It was a group of women coming together for the weekend to get their sweat on and empower each other. So naturally, I could speak about being determined to stick you your meal preps and workout routines. But for me, determination digs so much deeper than that.
It’s your firmness of purpose. By definition? The process of establishing something exactly – typically by calculation or research.
You’re determined, I’m determined. Every single person is determined – but for what reason? What is your motivation? And is it even that good for you?
Here’s the thing, I’ve been determined my whole life.
I was determined that I would have the best trip.
I was determined that I was going going to get the drunkest on Friday night.
You know, there’s so much that can go into determination – but what are you actually putting your energy into?
Never have to depend on others.
You are strong and independent.
So without me knowing, I created this story for myself. A story that had me walking around with a pair of tinted sunglasses that forever made me see life differently. That story lived deep down inside me. One that made me determined that I would never need help from anyone.
C. Help would mean that I had failed.
D. Help would mean that I was weak.
I took a year off after high school because I wanted to do way too many things with my life. I started working for a travel company in Toronto. One thing led to another and next thing you know I came home one day and told my parents I was going camping…in Zimbabwe – they thought I was crazy.
That trip changed my life. I felt was it was like to experience perspective. I was out of my comfort zone, in fact, I was uncomfortable as hell. And LOVED it.
Long story short, that brought another determination out of me – I would travel to 30 countries before I turned 30.
And I did just that. By 24 I had hit my goal and was living this picture perfect life. Key word being picture.
My life was far from perfect.
In between all of these Facebook and Instagram posts was a hot mess of a 24 year old girl. She was unhealthy, overweight, unsatisfied and completely lost. I had had this depreciating value of self worth. I was in a relationship where my boyfriend didn’t respect me, but I never left the relationship. I was in an abusive relationship with my boss at work, but couldn’t summon the strength to quit. I was anxious. I was depressed. I didn’t even know who the hell I was.
I feel like I have hit rock bottom in my life a few times; we’ll call this the Great Depression #1. But one thing was pretty much a fact even through all of this – I was determined that I was fine and I was determined that I did not need help.
So I did what I did best, ran away from my problems and went on a trip..because if you haven’t learned that running fixes all your problems, you should know that it does now.
I was determined to have a great trip, and I did. I was determined to start a new life here, and I did. I was determined to take control over my life and get healthier, and I’ve lost over 60 lbs.
OK FINE YOU PROBABLY GET IT, I’M DETERMINED.
Through all of this I just want you to consider what you pour your life, soul, love and energy into. Up until now I’ve spent my life so determined to bust my ass for whatever I wanted and the only thing that I didn’t put energy into was learning how to compassionately love myself.
I was not determined to respect myself, love myself, empower myself, care for myself or serve myself. Doesn’t that seem crazy?
So if you’re going to be determined to be or do something – be determined to take a stand for yourself. Do what you know you need to do, even though it won’t always be easy, or enjoyable at first, but it’ll get easier. Be determined for the right reasons.